Walking the Brooklyn Bridge!

So it's been a while since I've posted.  A long while.  That's mainly because things have slowed down a bit, which has indeed taken away some of my enthusiasm and fervor for writing!  But...here I am.  I'm back!  I had a little set back with a hurt back. Thank goodness it was nothing serious.  A couple of weeks in Physical Therapy and it's better.  No fixed...but better.  I pulled a muscle and found out that my herniated disk from about 5 years ago has fixed itself!  Now that's good news!!!  I'm on the mend and heading to New York City in 3 days! Yes...3 days! I'm so excited!  New York City is one of my favorite places! Love love love it!  I think one reason I haven't been back in several years is because it was hard work! It was not easy moving this old body from one place to another!  But I'm looking forward to this trip, 88 lbs lighter!  One of the first things we're doing is walking across the Brooklyn Bridge!  It's about 1.5 miles across. We'll start on the Brooklyn side and walk toward the city. Can. Not. Wait.  We've got a lot of other things planned and I'm sure pictures will follow!  I actually had to go shopping last weekend because I don't have any jeans to wear!  It was so much fun to just go into Ross, Marshall's, etc and get clothes! Wow!!  I loved that the jeans were cheap, since I'm probably going to be out of these jeans in a month or so.  It does make me a little sad that it is taking me a month or so to move through clothes...but I'm still moving and that's good.  It's been a little over 3 months and those first few months the clothes were falling off of my quicker than I could imagine!  All in good time...all in good time! :o)  I want to thank everyone for their continued support and encouragement!  I love that the folks at work call me "the incredible shrinking woman!" and I hear "Hey there skinny minny" at least 2-3 times a week!  Wow...what a concept! I'm in a FB group with a group of women who have been through the surgery and it's a great place to see the potential that I have ahead of me.  I can also go to them when I'm stressed about stalling or when I need to know about this whole losing hair thing, etc.  I am noticing that I'm losing some hair when I blow it dry and just hope that there is new hair growth right behind it!  I like my hair.  Yep yep.  Anyway, that's where things are.  I'm happy...I'm healthy...and I'm still thrilled I made this decision!

Holy Wow!

Well, it's been a minute since I posted...and since I'm using this blog as my attempt at therapy, I stopped today to try to figure out why I haven't wanted to "talk" to myself (an you guys) in my blog!  Well, I'm not real sure...so I'm just gonna type away and see what happens.

So this is the first thing I'd like to talk about. Yep...that's me on the left...and the right! Yep yep! The first picture was in October at our DMA event and the second picture was taken last weekend at our DMA event! Holy Wow! I have talked about this before, but until you actually SEE the picture and the difference it's still a little surreal.  SURREAL!  While I know this is what is supposed to happen...and what is actually happening, it is still pretty amazing when I see it! Happy Happy Happy!  This makes the little hiccups/stand stills that I've hit all make sense...it's all going the way it's intended...all in good time. I'm soooo on this!

Also, I hit the 75 lb mark today! Yep...you read it right...I've lost 75 lbs! Holy Wow AGAIN!  Again,excited!  I haven't been this size/weight in probably 10 years..if not more.  I'm looking forward to the next set of pounds that I lose!  There will be a need for shopping...guess I need to take those clothes to the resale shop sooner rather than later!

So, my exercise decresed tremendously, sad to say.  I've done something to my back.  I tried to walk the other day and shortly after I headed out I had to head back home....the next day the back was gone completely.  I have medicine and a MRI on Friday. I'm hoping it's something my Dr can fix with a shot or two!  The weather has been so so nice that I hate not being outside!  It's ok..everything happens for a reason...and it will all work out!  All in good time, right?!! Big sigh.

So, yea, things are going well.  Gotta get this back shaped up and I'll be good to go!  I'll touch base with you all when I have my next "I think I need to write something" moment! 

Third grade...gotta get weighed...and such.

It's busy season! It's official. Ugh.  UNT has started back.  Lamar has started back. and SFA has started back. Oh, and I have a real job! Good times!  These are the times that got me to the place that I needed to have the surgery in the first place.  It scares me a little bit...actually it scares me a lot.  While I realize is that I only have 4 oz of space in my tummy, poor choices can still mess things up!  I'm trying really hard to set up myself up...mindset and all...to make good choices and to get everything done in a timely and healthy manner! Yep...that's the plan! Wish me luck!

So, to reflect on my last week, I'm going to go all the way back to Friday! I went to see Susan and Elizabeth sing in Ft Worth.  The music was fabulous.  The company was fabulous...and the lemon cake was...you got it...fabulous! It was a really great night all together.  However, the icing on the cake was when my friend Susan just looked at me...with this sweet look on her face...with both of her hands on each side of her face...patting it...with a "WOW" look on her face...and said, "You just...you just..you just look so beautiful."  It's one thing when the people who see me all day every day...or when my family...says something nice...but when someone just says it...it was very nice.  It made me smile and it made my heart warm.  I'm including a song Susan sings that all us chubby girls have lived at one point or another...



The first line of the song alone is enough to make any chubby girl sweat a little! Thanks Suz for putting it all into song!!

So, last week when I walked I walked on the treadmill every day and shhh...don't tell anyone...but I actually ran a little.  Of course, my run is your walking fast. This week, in an attempt to throw my body a curve ball and encourage it to continue dropping the pounds/inches, etc I have walked distance.  2-3 miles at a time.  I would notice that I was walking...and I just kept walking and walking and walking!  One day I was walking and singing (poor neighbors) and another day I found myself walking and dancing.  Yes, dancing.  I do love the Pandora "Gwen Stefani" station!  Fergie...Gwen...Pink...good stuff!  And I would just walk aimlessly.  I wanted to make sure I hit 2 miles...or 3 miles...and I just kept walking!  It was a weird feeling.  I still think that how 2 months ago I would have laughed at you if you had said, "Just wait Callaway...you're gonna be a walking fool."  I think that's a stretch...but yea, I'm walking...and I kind of want to walk.  I walked when it was 40 degrees outside...bundled up and walked.  And of course, today, the weather was gorgeous and I couldn't get outside to walk before dark because of UNT stuff....but I did get outside and walked almost 2 miles. And, with all that walking I hope, pray, and really really want the scale to move tomorrow.  It hasn't been cooperating to the extent I'd like it to. I know, I know. I need to just let nature do it's thing.  I need to stay off the scale.  I need to just be...but it's hard.  The emotional part has probably been the hardest part so far.  Crazy isn't it?  Somewhere in the recesses of my mind I always thought that life would be so much easier/happier if I were just thin and/or losing weight.  Here I am...losing weight...and knowing that weight loss really is inevitable, especially right now (and for the next many months) and I'm still worried about it.  I suppose old habits die hard....right?

Eye on the prize!

Ok...so I've had a rough couple of days...maybe even weeks! I haven't seen the scale move at all and try as I might, I can't NOT look at the scale! I have tried and tried. So, I've accepted (I think) that my role in all this is to just accept what the scale says and deal with it. I will say the "stall" on the scale has sent me to the gym with much more fervor! I've actually found myself running (very slowly) in 30 second intervals! My goal is to get in a 20 minute mile and do whatever it takes to make that happen. Now, mind you, my exercise post-surgery has just been about moving. Walking. and not sitting. So, to think that 2 months later (yesterday was 8 weeks post-op) I'm moving my feet quick enough to call it a run...that's a big deal! I knew there would come a point that I'd step up my game, so to speak. The trainer is still an option...and I still haven't gotten the wheels aired up on the bike that my friends Shauna and Karen were kind enough to donate to my cause...but I'll get there!

So, in an attempt to push myself a little further and to give me a sense of success, I put together a before and after picture. I've looked at these pictures a hundred times, but until I put them side by side I don't think I really had any idea of a: how big I'd actually gotten and b: how well I'm really doing! So..I'm going to share it with you guys! Here ya go!

The picture on the left was taken at the DMA in October. That kiddo, ok, so he's a young man who happens to be taller than me, is my sweet little Christopher who I started babysitting when he was 2.  We continued working together for years in therapy and babysitting and though he probably doesn't know it, Christopher (and his family) played an important role in my life...in many special moments in my life! One of the sweetest moments was the day after I was diagnosed with my brain cyst I was babysitting...and when I wen to tuck Christopher into bed he started saying the Lord's Prayer.  I knew then that I was going to be ok! Thanks Christopher!  Ok, enough of that! Anyway...the picture on the right was taken a couple of weeks ago. You've seen this picture...I'm excited to see this picture!  I needed to see this picture...and I needed to see it compared to the other picture!  I needed to know that thus far, it's all been worth it.  The apple and peanut butter for dinner and boiled egg for lunch...it's all worth it!  The work is paying off and I continue to have my eye on the prize!!!

Hikes, roadblocks, & social events

Ya know...you get all excited because the weight is just falling off...which is what it's supposed to do. Then you start eating real food...like real food! Whatever you want food...just 4 oz at a time. Well, just as in "real life" sometimes the eyes are bigger than the stomach...and sometimes the not healthiest choices are what you want to eat. I knew going into this that if you continue to make bad choices, whether you can take in 4 oz or 40 oz you're not going to lose weight. I've hit that hump that I knew I would. It's frustrating. It's discouraging. It sucks. It will get better, I know. And I can hear sweet little Meagan the nutritionist saying, "if the scale isn't moving, your waistline is." However, in a society that is scale driven, roadblocks make it hard. There is a slight chance that hormones are effecting the tone of this blog...but this too is a part of life (and perhaps a side effect of the scale being stubborn). Big sigh.

On an upnote...I went to the Ft Worth Nature Center again today and took a lovely 3.15 mile hike with friends. We walked for an hour and 40 minutes. Don't get me wrong, I felt it, but I really didn't feel it until it was over. It was nice. I thoroughly enjoyed it. We saw little groundhogs and a bunny rabbit and lots of animal tracks (and poop). I think I'm going to hit the trails at Bear Creek this week to see what they're like. It's definitely more fun to be out in the woods than on the sidewalk. I'm also looking into water aerobics and a personal trainer. I know that movement will help with the hurdles (see paragraph above) and will ultimately lead to my feeling better...right??

So, I went to a social event on Thursday and saw a lot of people I haven't seen in a long long time! One friend said to me, "Callaway, you've got to get some clothes that fit!"...and I thought I WAS wearing clothes that fit. Ugh. It's a good problem to have, but let me tell you, I should have started a clothing fund months ago! Im half tempted to put one of those PayPal buttons on this page to accept donations to the cause! In the meantime, I'm cinching my britches and wearing shirts that are just probably too big. It's just going to have to be ok. Well, unless of course you'd like to donate! (ha...totally kidding.)

Three Miles & Clothes!

So, isn't that a movie?  Oh wait...that's 8 miles. Well..still 3 miles is exciting!  The last time I walked 3 miles in a row was in college...probably 1992...when I took a Jogging class! That was our final exam to walk/run 3 miles! That was a long long long time ago!  Today, I had no desire or motivation to do anything. I didn't want to walk...or play Wii dance...nothing. I was just feeling sluggish.  But, with a little encouragement from friends, I powered through! I'm pretty sure there will be a lot of days like these in my future...and hopefully with continued support I can push through!  I tell ya, walking and music and A.D.D. are a good combination! I just keep walking and walking and I listen to the music...and my mind races! It certainly keeps things interesting! Here is the screen shot from the app I use to check my mileage! Please keep in mind that I'm in absolutely no hurry when I walk. I walk because I need to and because I can.  I figure at some point that I'll get bored with my little walks and I'll put some time and distance parameters on it...one day...eventually...but not today.

Clothes...I guess I knew that my clothes would eventually be too big, but I don't think I thought it would happen this quickly!  I try on about 5 outfits (which again, I haven't done since college) and leave the house in clothes that look like a clown outfit because they're so big! I only have a handful of not clown big clothes! So, thanks to the advice from my friend Cheryl, I have found a couple of Plus Size resale shops! I'm hoping that I can sell some of my clothes and get some credit for some new clothes!  It's exciting to be excited about clothes...because I certainly haven't in years and years!  It's a good feeling. A really good feeling. 

Picture 'n Such

I've had a couple of people ask for a picture...so here ya go...I'm posting a picture! For those of you who haven't seen me in about 4 or so years, this is probably what you remember me looking like. Those who have seen me lately can really tell that I've lost weight!

I had a friend come into town today from Chicago so we hit up her old favorite restaurants! I had a small portion of an enchilada and refried beans, then for dinner she wanted Boston's Pizza so I ate the cheese and other toppings off and a little tiny bit of crust! Good stuff! So far so good folks!!!